Anthem

Recommended listening: Anthem by Superchick
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Hamlet
I just finished reading the play Hamlet by William Shakespeare. What made my experience of this text unique was that we read it by focusing on different critical approaches. One of the approaches which is strongly tied to Hamlet is the feminist approach. There are unique, dynamic and mysterious female characters that, despite having a limited number of lines, play a critical role in Shakespeare's Hamlet. By analyzing Ophelia and Gertrude, which I continue to do even after reading the play, I've really become enticed by the feminist approach.

One specific question that feminist critics ask that really sticks out to me is: How is the work "gendered"? That is, how does it seem to define femininity and masculinity? Which, of course, got me thinking about gender roles in my own life and how they shape identity.

Today's Society
Society, in many ways, is so deeply embedded with norms that it can be difficult to realize how they permeate our identity. When first studying the ideas of feminist critics I thought that they were hardly applicable in my life. I thought that, for the most part, I have been in complete control of my growth and identity. If I wanted to do something "manly" I would have no problem doing so. However, taking a closer look, there is practically no way to be immune to gender stereotypes and expectations without some sort of backlash.
I think one way that the differences between genders is clear today would be in terms of relationships. When dating, guys are often expected to pay, make decisions, and take control. They are supposed to "wear the pants", a common phrase used to express whomever is more masculine in a relationship.
By the same token, females are expected to be more submissive and obedient. When the roles are switched and the male seems to be the more obedient and submissive one he is deemed "whipped".
Our society is still very gendered in the respect that a stay-at-home parent is often expected to be the mother, whereas the primary source of income is "supposed" to be the man.
Then, of course, in terms of homosexual relationships gender plays quite a different role. I can't quite speak to that though.

My Life
I wouldn't consider myself very girly or manly, I just see myself as me. I don't doubt that gender roles and expectations, however, have shaped my understanding of Self. Sometimes I enjoy dressing up and getting all dolled-up as many females are expected to do. However, I typically prefer just chilling in sweats not caring at all about my appearance. I certainly do not enjoy or partake in cooking or cleaning of any sort. Which, by many standards, is perhaps my only purpose outside of childbearing.
I think that, in some ways, it is easier to be a woman and deal with gender expectations. If I choose to be sensitive and cry, as I did yesterday in Spanish class while watching Voces Inocentes, I am free to do so. If I choose to play sports or pig out with friends I may be considered "one of the guys" but that's about it. For boys, however, when they choose to behave in a more "feminine" manner, preferring to shop rather than play video games, their sexuality often comes into question. Personally, I think that occurs more often when boys act "girly" rather than when girls act "manly".

Have you felt that common ideas of femininity or masculinity have shaped your decision making? How does the feminist criticism play out in your life or in the texts you read?
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Rather than a quote for this post, here is a heuristic activity we did in my psychology class. Read it and think about it before scrolling down for the answer.

A father and his son are driving on a highway and get into a terrible accident. The father dies, and the boy is rushed to the hospital with major injuries. When he gets to the hospital, a surgeon rushes in to help the boy but stops and exclaims, “I can’t operate on this boy—he’s my son!” 
How can this be? 

Some girls and I after our Honors Gym 60 minute run.

If people have a hard time answering, they may be making a false assumption. The surgeon is the boy’s mother.

Build G-d, Then We'll Talk

Recommended listening: Build G-d, Then We'll Talk by Panic! At the Disco


*warning: The above video and the below book would likely be rated R. Although their content may be disturbing, such inappropriate elements contribute to their content and meaning.


What I've been up to...
One of the joys of time off from school is getting the chance to do things purely for leisurely purposes, rather than for class or college. The first week of winter break I had the privilege of going to Mexico with my family. While my brothers played cards and enjoyed some of the nightlife, I spent most of my time reading. I relish vacations because there are few things in life as magnificent as relaxing at the beach and being totally consumed by a good book. This trip I finished two novels, Tricks by Ellen Hopkins and Firefly Lane by Kristin Hannah, and I'm still reading Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.
While I highly recommend all of these titles, the book I would like to focus on for this post is Tricks. In the spirit of an honest review, I will certainly try my best to be as objective as possible. However, you should be warned that Ellen Hopkins is my favorite author of all time.

Style
At any rate, Tricks is written in verse, as are all of her books. I am a huge fan of poetry, I've always loved both reading and writing, but I firmly believe that even those who deem themselves as poetry illiterate or claim to dislike anything other than prose will find that Hopkins has a unique, gripping style.


This specific book is Hopkins' take on the staggering amount of teen prostitution in the United States.


Characters
The book is narrated in third person and follows the lives of five teenagers whose paths eventually cross, and the role "tricks" play in their lives. One of the greatest strengths in this book is the authenticity of all five main characters. Their voices are each so genuine and unique. Although each of them is somehow touched by the issue of turning tricks, their perspectives still differ.
For example, Ginger's mother is a prostitute. Therefore, when faced with the problem of teen prostitution in her own life, Ginger is avidly opposed to it and completely disgusted with those who subject themselves to such a life.
By contrast, there is Cody who is a nice, "All-American" kid -- someone who never thought twice about the world of tricks. I don't want to spoil the book, but let me just say that he does far more than a 180 and where he ends up is both surprising and haunting.
As someone who focuses a lot on identity, it was very interesting to realize how many different traits the characters had and how their perspectives were shaped by their personal varying experiences.


Concept
Outside of compelling characters, I appreciate Hopkins' work in this book because she is able to bring an issue to life. She makes her commentary by giving multiple angles on the issue, and giving it depth. She doesn't pretend anything is black and white or simple. The depth of the characters and their struggles puts the reader in a position where they are both perplexed and compelled to address it. In many ways, this book is downright disturbing. The world I fell into while reading was ugly and difficult to comprehend, but Hopkins made me really understand and empathize with a lot of what is going on as we speak. Although the book is a work of fiction, unfortunately none of the stories are far-fetched whatsoever. The statistics are staggering, and if for no other reason, I believe people should read this book in order to get a glimpse into the hell that is daily life for so many teens right here at home.


Critique 
The ending.
That's exactly what it was like, it just ended. I should have realized that around page 600 the end wasn't far away, but I read the final poem over and over, in complete disbelief. Although I was disappointed with the lack of resolution and the plethora of questions I still had, I have no doubt that this was an intentional move. I wasn't expecting a happy, cookie-cutter ending, but the fact that I knew hardly anything about where the characters were heading and what was coming next in their lives was unsettling. I believe this was Hopkins' goal though. Like the ending, the problem of teen prostitution hasn't necessarily been answered yet. And, like the characters, those truly struggling don't know what tomorrow holds.


Overall
Ultimately, I really enjoyed this book. It isn't my favorite Hopkins piece, (for that I would recommend Identical) but I certainly was not disappointed. I appreciated this novel because the verse was spot-on, the concept was riveting, and the characters had depth and beauty. As someone who likes to focus and question identity, the characters definitely didn't let me down!
*This is also a great review I would recommend checking out if you'd like an opinion other than just my own.


Sooner or later someone you could not have ever dreamed of appears like a rainbow, bridging clouds, and steals your breath away. Someone beautiful, inside and out, grabs hold of your hand, guides you along a rarely traveled road, to a place where your broken heart can be mended, pieceby beating piece. The cost, gratefully afforded, is only your love. 
Tricks, Ellen Hopkins

Everybody

Recommended listening: Everybody by Ingrid Michaelson
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One word that has come up a lot in my life lately is empathy. In English the concept of empathy has been discussed through the memoir we're reading. In my Psychology class we have discussed empathy through the manifestation of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a personality disorder characterized by lack of empathy. And then, in my life outside of academics, I have certainly noticed empathy at play. I recently had the privilege of leading a religious retreat called Kairos (previously referred to in my post Take My Hand) where the empathy, compassion, and love shared between participants was boundless. Outside of that, those who know me would certainly say I have a strong sense of empathy. In fact, I often joke that I have an "overactive empathy gland" because I cry so much in response to anything from the emotions of those around me to fictitious events portrayed in film.

The Basics
All of the recent talk about empathy has led to a significant amount of rumination and ultimately, this post. First and foremost, certain ideas must be sorted out. When I was younger I had a problem differentiating between sympathy and empathy. After establishing the definition of empathy, it is then essential to note situations in which people commonly feel empathy. I believe, as do other sources, that the root of empathy lies in common ground on the wide spectrum of human feelings and experiences. A few common threads that many share are: loss, love, faith, happiness, desire, friendship, pressure, and disappointment. I would argue that, to some extent, most people have felt or gone through almost all of the above. This similarity helps to establish the framework for empathy in more specific situations.

Results of Empathy
Empathy, in my opinion, certainly has its advantages. For example, those who are able to feel empathy towards others typically have successful, caring relationships where communication about emotions is prevalent. On the flip side, when one is personally struggling with something, the empathy of others is often integral in dealing with the issue and feeling supported. This is perhaps why people who have trouble with empathy also have difficulty interacting with others and establishing deep relationships. Personally I have found my ability to feel empathy has helped me reach out, help, and guide people. I also feel empathy is one of the core reasons I am able to connect with those around me, despite superficial differences.

A Look Within
So we know that empathy impacts our interactions with those around us, but what does empathy do to us? How does our ability, or inability, to feel empathy impact who we are?
I think empathy primarily impacts our identity in the sense that it plays a role in both how those around us perceive us and how we perceive ourselves. If we have a strong sense of empathy then we are often characterized as more emotional people. Those who lack empathy may be seen as colder or having feelings that are buried far below the surface. Our capacity for empathy then sheds light on our personality as a whole and the way in which we approach feelings.

As for me...
There are certainly times when I wish I didn't feel empathy so strongly. For instance, it's never fun being the one person whose sniffles echo through the room or surprising people with my excitement or tears of joy on their behalf. However, I am starting to recognize that not only is there nothing to be ashamed of, but that my approach to connecting to others is a critical part of who I am. I believe my sense of empathy has shaped how other people perceive me as well as how I perceive myself. I think that people come to me for advice because they know that, on some level, I can relate to what they are going through. I think that people see me as a genuine person because I don't hide my empathy. And, because I do feel for others so deeply, I have discovered my passion for psychology. Although in some ways I'm concerned that I have too much empathy to provide adequate therapy, I know that the degree to which I feel empathy is part of who I am and will certainly shape my future.


The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy. 
Meryl Streep